If you’re anything like me, then you’ve struggled with low self-esteem. I know firsthand how hard it is to look in the mirror and see someone who’s not worthy of love or respect.
Self-esteem has been called a “mirror” of our lives because it reflects how we think about ourselves, both positively and negatively.
When our self-esteem is low, it creates negative cycles that hold us back from reaching our full potential as human beings.
Thankfully there are many things we can do to increase our self-esteem. Random funny questions are also a great way to get a conversation going. These questions can be asked anywhere at any time, even if you don’t know the person well. They can help break the ice and keep things lighthearted in awkward situations.
Acknowledge and accept your emotional responses
Acceptance is a key factor in mental health and being able to accept yourself is no exception. Though it may seem like an easy concept, acceptance is actually a process that can take time and practice. It’s important when working on your self-esteem that you understand what acceptance means:
- Acceptance does not mean resignation or giving up on your goals; it’s simply acknowledging what is happening right now in order for you to move forward. For example: if I am feeling down about something but know that continuing this behavior will only make me feel worse in the long run, then it’s time for me to accept my current feelings so that I can find new ways of coping with them (or even just wait until they subside).
- The opposite of acceptance isn’t denial, it’s self-loathing. Not accepting yourself results in negative thoughts about yourself rather than allowing those thoughts to go and focusing instead on the positive aspects of your life. When trying this technique out for yourself, remember these 3 rules:
1) You don’t have control over everything;
2) Some things will always be beyond your control;
3) The only person who defines success or failure is yourself.
Practice self-compassion
We all make mistakes, and it’s important to remember that we are human. The ability to be kind to ourselves when we mess up is essential in building self-esteem.
This doesn’t mean that you should be overindulgent or self-obsessed, it just means being kinder than you usually are to yourself. If your goal is long-term health, then heaping on the guilt won’t help anything. It’s more helpful to think of your past mistakes as learning experiences than as reasons for shame and punishment.
Embrace imperfection
Another step toward improving your self-esteem is to accept that you’re not perfect. This can be difficult, but it’s the first step in being able to focus on what you do well and how to improve upon your weaknesses. Accepting imperfections doesn’t mean being content with them or giving up on trying to change them, but rather accepting that they exist and other people will notice them too (and they may even point them out).
Having this mindset allows you to focus on what’s important: identifying what needs improvement and working towards making those improvements so that others who know about these flaws have fewer reasons, not to respect/like/love you.
Take pride in yourself by recognizing your strengths and talents
There are many ways to build your confidence. One way is to recognize the things that you do well, or even just enjoy doing. Whether it’s cooking a delicious meal, playing an instrument, or being a good friend, take pride in it. You can also take pride in the things that you have achieved, even if they’re small achievements like learning how to cook an egg without breaking it (like me).
Remember that all of us have different talents and skills; some people may be more physically gifted than others, while some might have better communication skills. Whatever you’re good at will help make up who you are as a person, and this is something worth celebrating.
